Les Passeports

We got them back today. FI.NA.LLY. I couldn't help but felt emotionless the moment I received them back. It was surreal. Couldn't believe it could happen to us. It's just too good to be true.
My sister is going to buy a car. Most likely, she is getting a Toyota Corolla Runx or Allex model. We have been searching for a car for a week now, so I think we are close to buy this car from the dealer where we got the douche's car. The problem is that it costs so so much. Around $14,000. I don't think we have that kind of money hanging around. We'll see aye.
Tomorrow I'll be seeing Andy. We made the appointment for today, but I completely forgot! So tomorrow it is.

Things I am getting tomorrow when we out;

• bank card
• license
• library
• number for school
• school application

Good Gesture Turned To Mush

I just posted saying that I was cooking something out of the ordinary tonight for everyone. My sister in law had made us the very dish last night, so I thought I might want to emulate her success tonight. I did it with the help of my sister, who did the cooking of the meat and the shrimps in the shed, as well as some cleaning. It was done and I asked the kids to eat it when they returned from Uncle K's house.

We finished the meal in no time. I, in particular, enjoyed it very much because it was healthy and tasty as well. My sis too was enjoying the meal. The kids however showed no interest. Jord didn't even want the rice noodles that I provided into his bowl. He asked for rice instead. The girl also wanted little amount and even that, she couldn't finish. I was abit upset over that.

Despite the children's disapproval, the most letdown was their mum's reaction to it. I know that I should've asked her to eat it, rather than have her wandered around peeping in to see what the foods were. She told me that she didn't like it. Then she realised what she had said was rude, so she retracted her saying by adding she's going to school tomorrow, which makes her not like that. She'd like rice with veges rather. Once I heard it, I was disappointed to hear it. It is because it was in a way something I hoped they'd enjoy as much as I do. I went to pack up the dishes and washed immediately.

I haven't told my sister about it. She'd be angry too if she heard it. I just ignored the question when she asked if the douchey couple had tasted it. It's not something I'd like to share if it could hurt the relationship.

This is not coming from the anger when they didn't even want to touch the foods (it happened right before she came into the kitchen and saw the food) but when I was in the bathroom, I overheard the d scolding at his wife. I don't know the whole conversation as I only got into the bathroom when they almost finished conversing. She told him about what the kids did, impersonating the sounds of the kids. He was painting the fence when this was happening, and it got him bothered. He scolded at her, telling her to shoosh, and to go shopping already.

I was really astonished to hear the sound of the car engine starting. I couldn't believe that she was taking this crap from him. Sometimes, I feel that people are just blind to what they don't want to see. When they have certain things, the badness tend to be folding under them. She is blind to all these bullshits. She is trapped without realising it. Or does she already know, but pretending to be ignorant of it, just so she could get by daily? However she thinks, it is not healthy in anyway.

What's the lesson learned from this evening? Don't be nice and make stuff that you think people would like. It would only lead to disappointment. In this family, that is the only thing they surely know how to do.

Japanese

Learning Japanese is harder than I anticipated. I knew going into it that it's quite hard seeing how difficult their writing system is. But I thought I knew Chinese Mandarin, so it wouldn't be so. I was wrong. Their grammar is also complicated. I hope digging deeper into the language it would become easier. Right now I am studying how to ask for the price of certain items.

Going Off In The Car

Oh boy..oh boy. The afternoon was filled with a crazy scene. It was almost deja vu for me. Really. It was. I hated every moment of it. For what it's worth, I don't want to be in the same situation again. I don't want to ask for any favours from my brother any longer. At least, one favour that involves his wife.

So what happened? Well we were going to this place in the Glen Ennis to view the cars there. IT was like a flea market for cars. There were many car available there, but none interested us. We wasted about twenty or so minutes there, just walking around the park. Then as we headed to Otahuhu to get check out the dealerships in the area, L began nagging. She nags alot actually. Today I felt an undertone of discontent. Whenever things don't go as she wanted, you could feel it in the atmosphere that she isn't happy. Today, she made her discontent obviously.

We arrived at one of the dealerships along the road where many dealerships were present. We looked into one of them, seeing nothing we liked. L considered this a waste of time, because my brother was looking for a particular car model. If he liked that car so much, why are wasting our time searching around? She wanted to find out.

This little nagging in time turned to one that could cause world war three. It was that bad, due to her raised voice. She was quite annoying actually. I could see what she meant by saying that he was only interested in a limited choice of cars, which was quite stupid. I mean the car is meant for my sister to drive, so ultimately it would be her choice in the end. My brother made it that the car he saw at the GM place was the chosen one, despite some objection from me and my sis. The problem I saw with L was the way she went about it. She was vocal, which was unhelpful. In fact, it was really tense for the rest of us.

The tense was carried on for the rest of the ride. We stopped at this truck rental place, and she was acting quite bitchy. Sorry to use the term on her, since she is normally nice, but her attitude in the car today warranted the namesake. My brother calmed down and invited her to look at the trucks. They are moving next Saturday, so he was looking for a truck to shift their things. He was acting nicely, inviting inside. She gave him the silence treatment. So the intensity increased by ten fold from there.

After that, my brother asked if we would have lunch. She insisted on going back home, to the point that she almost raised her voice again. IT was going to be painful. Ken could only do as best as he could, which to stay quiet and to obey.

In that twenty or so minute ride, I felt like killing myself just to get out of the car. It was just bad. BAD.

She left the car as soon as the car got to her place. My brother asked where we'd go for lunch. We ended up going to club. There we spoke of our situation. Ken asked where we'd like to move to once we got our passies back. He suggested that we should move in with him in Hamilton, because it would help us, providing us with shelter, and it would ease his problem by working for him. I don't know how to reply. All I know right now is I want to apply for school, despite the uni starts tomorrow. As for where to sleep, I just don't care. Wherever, but as long as it is as far away from everything as possible. That's all I know. But of course I couldn't say that to him. I just said that I don't know, maybe stay with the douchey couple for the time being if I did get admitted to school. Otherwise, it is most likely I am going to work for him. This though is a predicament that I am trying to solve. Nothing is certain.

My sister pushed me to say that I would want to live with her until I go to school and get a job. I haven't promised her anything yet, because again I don't know for sure of what to do next.

Lunch was done and we departed ways. He drove us back to the house, and he left, possibly going to a friend's house, seeing he wouldn't want to return to a house with a madwoman inside. I wouldn't want to too.

That is our afternoon. Though we did go to the library for alittle bit. Right now the o is taking the children to Uncle K's place. I am making this rice noodle treat for dinner. It was the same meal I had at Ken's last night. I enjoyed it so I am trying to emulate it. Hopefully it'd be good.

Going Auto Shopping

Am going with my brother and his wife to the auto "flea market" in a few minutes. I thought I'd like to blog for a little bit in the while waiting for him to arrive.

Ok he just called I gotta go.

Current Events

• K, I and my brother with his wife have been looking for a car for my sister. We have been at it since Tuesday, going to auction houses to get a bargain. It is all complicated since we have a small budget to begin with. My sister apparently likes a small typed car, which looks similar to a beetle. The ones we looked at, I think her fav is the VW Polo. The price though doesn't match the budget, infact more so than not.
• I am trying to get my japanese studies up to intermediate level. I have been trying to get contacts with people who can teach me the subject on Facebook.
• My brother and his wife are almost done with purchasing the butchery in Hamilton. They are in the process of change of ownership after having done the negotiating. If things are going according to plan, we will move in on the 7th next month.
• My brother had asked me to help him out for the first week. They acquired rent on this apartment in the Hamilton CBD, with two rooms, apparently one for themselves while the other is for moi if I decided to stay there over weekend, or in the while I go help them. My feeling is neutral. I don't think I want to stay there long term, being that I don't feel comfortable and the fact that I hate doing butchery.
• The earthquake that happened in Chch earlier this week in the time I was sitting in the car waiting for my brother and his wife while in the lawyer's office. We stayed there after we had just been to the auction. We heard of the news over the radio. It's sad and I hope the families involved in the quake will find good news.

Unhappy

Unhappy. I just saw Brige two days ago, I felt better, then it reverted back to my bad mood. This is what I am feeling right now. It's the feeling that I don't want to live, because there is no point.

Jealousy. I am envious for the people who have got their things straightened. I hate it.

Do You Trust Me?

I went to see my counsellor at around 6.30pm. I was supposed to see her on Saturday but the car situation permitted the meeting to desolve. I called the centre on Monday to reschedule which I got the appointment for tonight.

Here are what we discussed in today's session;

• We talked about the kids' mum has now changed. She is starting to take the kids to school and back, which made me feel left out as I don't know what to do. She understood that if you want something so bad, suddenly you got, it leaves you feeling empty. I got that sentiment when I was made redundant without the kids to look after.


• With the kids now being taken care off by their mum, do I still want to leave the house. I said I don't know, but still wanting to move as I want more freedom. She proceeded to ask what sort of place do I want to move to, like an apartment with roommates, or a school hostel. I couldn't pick initially as I felt both are the same, with respect to being people I don't know, which is scaring at the same as the financial problem this may cause. In the end, I said the school hostel. I think it's more cheaper.


• The conversation moved to the swimming lesson. I said that I had my uncle taking me, instead of the lesson that I meant to take. The problem was that he also brought his family along, which lessen our time for swimming lesson. She asked if I could tell him to take the lesson more seriously, meaning he shouldn't bring his family. Also, she asked about my relationship with my uncle, is the sort of person I could talk to easily? I responded that he's ok, and I do feel comfortable talking about stuff. At the same time, other things I don't feel I want to trouble him, as he has his family to worry about.


• I told Brige about the short story of Walter Mitty. She brought up about my sleeping habits, which is something I hate doing, I told her. I likened the hate for sleeping with a prelude of fantasing to the charater Walter. I mentioned the story being that I could relate to the title character. Like myself, he fantasises about scenarios that make heroic. The difference is that he sees himself in the fantasies, whereas I view myself being in someone else's shoes achieving those magnificent. So in a way, I am not the hero in my own fantasies.


• She said she'd read the story. Would she see me in the story? I said that I am different in him in regard to our age difference and he thinks of himself the hero within his fantasies. He gets beaten by the people around him, which I always felt in my own everyday memory. But I don't think he is me, but a relatable person.


• We also talked about my anxiety. How the first time I came to see her, I was anxious and didn't want to come in. I was sitting in the car outside, and was shaking and thinking that I shouldn't be here. Brige pushed the conversation to why I felt that I shouldn't come in. I said because of money and time I don't want to waste. WHose money was I spending on counselling? My mum's, which she gave me as pocket money. I said I don't like spending it as I wish to return all the amount she has been giving me. I feel it's dirty and it's a charitable thing that she's doing. Brige of course went on saying that she's my mum, therefore it's her duty to give me the money. Also, she said that lots and lots of mums out there do the same thing, so I shouldn't think this way. I still don't like it.


• The talk about my mum turned to if she knew about me coming here? I said no because she wouldn't like it. She would go bananas, as that would make her look bad in front of others. I think she would think only crazy people go see counsellors. I don't feel ashamed but I don't want people know that I am seeing a counsellor.


• Do I trust Brige? On a scale from one to ten, with one being the relationship horrible and ten is where the trust is mutual, where is our relationship standing? I said that it would be high number. Do I feel anxious with her, after four sessions? I do feel better with entering the door, but not so great in pertaining to talking to her. We then practised sitting right. Her homework for me is to sit properly, with my hands on the side relaxed. There are some habits that we've been teaching ourselves for so long that when an anxiety hits, we would naturally revert to a bad habit, which for me the nail biting and not knowing how to position my hands. I should therefore "unlearn" the bad habits, and substitute it with a good habit, which is sitting relaxingly, and comfortably. If we could do that, we can at least calm down the anxiety, or show less symptions externally.


• Lastly we chatted about the periodic interval in which to see each other. I questioned what is the norm for her to see patients. She said sometimes people prefer to see on a weekly basis, whereas sometimes fortnightly. They could change from seeing her weekly to fortnightly depending on the patient's comfortability. As for me, I honestly said that money is a factor in me seeing her fortnightly, something I'd like to change to a weekly thing. She said yea, we should and she wanted to book me for five weekly sessions for the next five weeks. Also the counselling centre would help me with paying for $25 off the cost for each session. I agreed because I wanted to have someone to talk to, as every two weeks is too long for me. So I am seeing her at the same time next week.

The session was good. I would prefer that we talked about my fear of aging and the number that I hate being. I hope she liked the short story I told her about, and I hope to talk to her about my greatest fear in next week's meeting.

Just arrived home from another night spent at the Lantern Festival. This time though we were going there with my brother and his wife. We had dinner at the pizza place called La Porchetta in the city. Good food and great service. We remained at the festival until the fireworks. It was really awesome. Enjoyed the night very much. Here are the pictures from yesterday night with the kids and tonight's pix;

The firework at the end. It was really good. My cam didn't it justice.
There was a lion and dragon dance in the middle of the food area. I expected more from this really, but it was cool nonetheless.

Lanterns. Many shapes and sizes were present.

Ice cream on waffle with fruits. Jude was enjoying the dessert all by herself.

Lantern Festival

Tonight's lantern festival was fun. It was really crowded but was really fun. I enjoyed it alot along with the food. Definitely the foods were great. The children enjoyed themselves as well. We couldn't find K's friend SL. Oh well. The parents didn't come. Thought they were going to tag along, but no. So it was just the four of us there. Uncle K didn't come along as well. Tried to contact him on his cell, but he didn't answer it. It was a good night nonetheless. I am going to sleep now.

I will post pictures tomorrow.

Dude, Where Is My Car?

When we went outside ready to go to counselling, there was one particular large thing missing in the driveway. Yea, the car was gone. I thought K was playing a trick on me. IT turned out it wasn't the case. The car was really gone!

SO what happened to it? Well, apparently somebody took it to the shop in the wee hours in the morning. I didn't know why they did that, because within a few minutes, I saw the car with the o inside drive into the driveway. It became clear from that point that she took the car with her in the morning so that she could come back to rest for the whole day at home. So that is the new routine.

Without the car, it was impossible for me to go to counselling. I immediately called their main reception but there was only voice message, which I left saying I couldn't make for the time being because there had been an emergency. She hadn't called to ask where I was, so guess it went through.

On Monday, I will have to call her to reschedule for the missed session. I don't want to do that. Not sure yet when I want to roschedule the appointment to. It might be depending if she has an opening on the weekdays.

After seeing that the car was missing, K right away called my brother for him to come. Not because she was thinking about the car, she wanted to go to this car show. It was a selfish decision. My brother was coming as the o had already arrived. What was more stupid was she didn't inform him that she had come back with the car. My brother was already reaching the house when I told her to make the call. He didn't bother by it, so it didn't matter. But still, there could've been a problem if Ken didn't like the situation.

Ken and L came to the house and they were greeted by the o nicely. They talked and talked until the o was introduced to butchery that is on sale. They then agreed to see it together, with my brother leading the car infront.

After seeing the butchery, we all headed to the restaurant nearby. We ate for almost an hour. We departed at that point with the o taking her kids to Chinese school, and us going to the car auction show.

I was trying to be diplomatic when I informed her of the usual suspects that she might expect if she took the kids to school. I felt stupid and awkward for doing that. I don't know. I just felt that way.

We eventually made it to the car show. It was tiring to be honest. Toward the end, I just couldn't keep my eyes open. It was that boring and quite annoying. The auctioneer was merely doing his job but why do they have to be so loud and annoyingly quick?

When we left, there wasn't anything else we could do, so we eventually returned to the house. My brother and his wife are not coming, since they both have other things to do. He said he will go tomorrow night, and if we wanted to too, he could come to collect us. I don't know about that. I do want to have a night away from the kids. But we would already have been there, so there is not much point in going back to the same place we had already been to the night prior. We'll wait and see.

I slept a bit in the afternoon. Still exhausted from the day spent at listening to howling dogs howled, it was a good nap. Just asked the o about going to tonight's lantern festival, it because apparent that she didn't want to come along. So it would be me, k and the kids. I don't like the girl so if we went with her, I am not going to buy her anything. Only the boy, if he was good.

Oh, and SL and her sister's family are coming too. We are meeting them at the festival.

Going to See Bridge

I am about to go to see Bridge. She gave an assignment to do, which was to draw the imaginary hole. I hated doing this since I don't know what the hole looks like. So instead I drew a well, and the bottom couldn't be seen. I didn't want to make too much imagery of how I deep I feel at times, but drawing a bottomless well is on its way to represent my current state of mind. It's getting late for the appointment, so I better go.

Working for Uncle K

What a day. For this week, we were doing nothing as the norm has come back from holiday. You know the routine before the Christmas break. We took them to school, while doing nothing in the while they were at school, then time came to pick them up. Well this week is replete with this routine. So today, K and I did something out of the ordinary. We went to uncle K's shop and helped him out.

WE normally do travel beyond the parameter of the house location. This is due to the increased oil price. We rather traveled predominantly around the park and to the library. Today though, we learned that uncle K is without workers at the shop. He has been working sans workers for the duration because the baker had moved away. His shop is pretty tiny, so he and his wife work there not too big of a problem. Granted, no one wants to work this much, so we decided that we'd help out. We went there around 10.40 and arrived at approx. 11.15.

They seemed joyous to see, which was a good sign. I was afraid in the beginning that they would view this as something intrusive or something. Rather, we were greeted with smiles. They did say if we wanted to help further, come earlier as that would be busier hours when a lot of customers march in. I think we would do that, just so they could relax alittle.

With that done, we traveled for almost hour, albeit the traffic congestion, and when we arrived at school, we were late. The children were already left. K said they must have gone to the office, waiting for us there. I was not in the same boat. I was indeed at fault when we saw them there. The kids said the teacher told them to go there and wait as she was locking up the back gate.

Afterward, we headed to the Korean supermarket to get snacks. Uncle K earlier had asked us to go and pay for his Sky bills at their main office. We therefore were going there after getting the snacks.

There was a bad episode. It was called the girl who refused to wear clothes to go piano lesson. That's all I am going to touch on the subject because she was the demon.

Now, I just finished cleaning out the fridge. I saw the o was cleaning the garage and offered my help. The aid eventually turned to cleaning out the fridge for the kitchen shed. So now we go.two kitchens in the house. Don't ask why we have two. According to them, the second kitchen, which sits in the shed, is for daily cooking, whereas the main house kitchen becomes occasional kitchen. I guess they don't want to dirty their house, thus allocating the most dirty-0attracted place to the shed.

Am going to walk with my sister now.

Weekend In Review

I know yesterday's post was bizzare. I was dazed by the huge amount of shouting, yelling, scouting, scolding going on in the house. I had been walking for the last one hour and a half, which was tiring for my feet. Upon returning to the house, I heard the oral battle between K and the girl. I couldn't take it.

What were they shouting about? It was due to the girl's reluctance to do her homework. I don't understand the reason for my sis' to do what she did, because she would normally be cool about that sort of thing. Homework is more down my alley. I think she wanted to lessen my workload by asking the girl to complete it before I returned. It didn't work, did it?

Ok I will get away from depressing speech, and we'll look at last weekend's activities. The weekend had been my productive and most fun weekend I have had for quite sometime. On Saturday, K and I went out to see her friend T's last day in this country. We were planning on taking a ferry at 7.15 to go over to the Waihiki Island. We missed it, for there was a heavy traffic in the city. The whole night turned out to be good, despite missing the ferry.

On Sunday, it was my boyboy's bd. It looked like the day wasn't going to be his, apparently because the parents seemed cool about not making it special for the boyboy. Why do I say that? That's because they were doing the stuff at the shed instead of organising the boyboy's party, which it didn't look like it was happening. By around 7.30 though, uncle K and family came. It was then that we found out (me+k) there was a cake inside the freezer (who puts cakes in freezer?) I took it out, being told to do so by the o. We then sang the birthday song to the boyboy, in the while he couldn't contain his excitement. I knew what was on his head. All he wanted was to have the presents, don't really care for the cake and the party that much. He asked me about the presents as soon as he knew the day was his special one. We did give his gifts; K gave him a beyblade stadium, I the mighty beans pack and uncle K a truck that can be taken apart and together again. The boyboy was so happy. He loved all his gifts.

For the majority of the night, we had dinner as normal. The kids began playing with their new toys. We had dinner on the dining table, I felt that it didn't like a party. Some awkward moments did sneak its head in.
Oh, btw, the cake was homemade. Actually, it was bakerymade as the d made it in his shop.

...

The cruel thing that is life. Is there really god?

The Birthday Celebration that Wasn't

Today is my little cousin Jord's birthday. He is happy about it but the excitement seems to be enjoyed by the very birthday boy himself. We did get him some presents, my uncle also made us buy the boy something. Other than those, the boy will only receive three gifts. The douche and the oppressed apparently don't care. He is doing his shed right now, and his wife is cooking dinner, where there was a spark of eruption earlier. She is mad at K and I, I believe, but her temper was heard toward her children, particular to her daughter. The only thing they do today that remotely resembles a birthday is the cake.

We took the children to the library. It is a new place since they moved a few days ago. We wanted to see the inside, which was quite big and quite cool. In the meantime, K did her research on philosophy, something she is into nowadays. The kids were at the kids' area where they looked at books. They eventually got one book each and when K had done with her researching, we headed to our next destination, which is the warehouse.

Once there, we looked around. I, the distracter. took the kids detouring around the place, whereas my sister was looking for presents. We swapped places and finally decided upon getting three presents for Jord (for uncle, he would give the boy a cup toy thing at $20, K the beyblade stadium and moi the silly beans), and one for the girl (a box set of toy grocery items) as we had missed her bday when she was on vacation. I think the total cost tallied at around $100. Not good news for our pockets.

When we got out of the place, we headed to the supermarket to get some lunches for them. Looking at the whole day spent, it is all about the kids today. We were there for some time and got home after that.

When the couple came back home, only a short while after we arrived, they immediately stormed to do their nonsense tasks in the shed. It is shit. I don't get it. They didn't get want to see their kids first. They just went to straight to fixing that damn thing, which is so stupid. Anyway, I don't know if we are having a birthday party for the boy. The girl just informed me that the douchey couple at least made a cake for him. I just don't know what to do.

Dinner Date

Tonight we went out to the city central to meet up a friend who is leaving fro oz tomorrow. We were gonna go to the Waiheke via ferry but we were late for the departure time, which we then decided to just eat around waterfront. The evening was good.

Before leaving the house, I had to tell my aunt that we were going to a friend's party. I told aunt that the friend is leaving the country so we are spending the final night with her. Aunt was cool about it, which is something I hadn't really seen in awhile. The kids were eager to come along too, but of course we couldn't bring them with us. At around 6.15, we left for K's friend named A, who we then drove with to the city.

We arrived there in no time being her place is only minutes away. We waited there for another friend who was in my sister's class. His name is Vin. We waited for him, for he was still at work and he was our designated driver. Once he arrived, we all got on his car and drove to Penrose, where T, the person who is leaving to oz, lives. We picked her up and made our way as fast as possible to catch the 7.15 ferry. There, three more friends (Min, Far, and one other girl who I had no idea about but later discovered her name is Daisy) were waiting.

The traffic was terrible in the city. There were road fixings which delayed our journey to the point that we couldn't find carpark in time for the ferry. We rather sat at the pier and chatted away. We wondered should we wait for the next ferry which would be coming in around 8.45? Some people wanted to go and some people preferred not to. In the end, fate had made the choice for us. The shops, therefore the restaurants, on the island are closed after 5pm, as found out later. This meant that we walked around to look for food in downtown.

We ventured around the harbour, and finally settled on this Japanese restaurant named Kanmor. It was an open air restaurant which we could see the ocean from it. It was a nice setting. We took pictures, and chatted further. It was a good atmosphere.

We each ordered our separate foods. I got this salmon teppanyaki, something I hadn't tasted before. The name implied expensive and delicious, and the cost was quite dear. Still, it appealed to me. K had chicken don. Hers looked good when it arrived on the table. And quite cheap too. So I was quite envious that she got a good deal. For drinks, we tried fruit cocktail and a drink called sunset (tasted like grapefruit with ice). The meals were ok at best. I was fooled by the name and the cost of it, which I felt they should've been better, given we were at the harbour. Anyhoo, the total charge was around $55.

After dinner, the girls sans my sister wanted to go clubbing, or at go have some drinks in the club. K, who had no id with her, myself and Vin didn't go in. Instead we headed to Mission Bay to have Movenpick ice creams there. Vin;s reason to not enter the club was he was the designated driver, therefore he wouldn't be able to drink anyhow. I also believe he was being gentlemanly in that he saw us not going in, so he wanted to accompany us.

He and K chatted for the majority of the time. I felt a chemistry between them. I don't know, but by the sounds of their conversation, they shared many interests, including cars, computers, and travelling. I felt like a third wheel.

We stopped this corner and lined up in the queue for the ice creams. My sis, still feeling the sickness from fodd poisoning, didn't have any. I paid for my and Vin's ice creams. We both had cappucino flavoured ice creams.

We detoured around the city in waiting for the girls to come out of the club. When 11.30 came, they called and we went to them at the carpark on Quay St. We talked for a little bit and we parted ways from there.

It was a good evening. I guess Vin was quite a good person in that he tried to make feel included as much as possible. The other girls, however, cannot be said about them. A was pretensious in my opinion. Just my opinion.

My sis had a good time, she said. Tomorrow/tonight since it has already past 12, we might take T to the airport. Vin arranged the meeting. I don't know though, if I wanted to go. K might be willing to tag along.

Throwing Tantrums

I love the children dearly. I know when the situation comes, I would take a bullet for them. That's how much I love these kids. But at times, they can be the most obnoxious, annoying people on the face of the planet. Take last night for example; we were having dinner, Jude intentionally tried to evade dinner by acting up. Initially she was prepared to eat, but after we refused to give in for her demand for us to dehead the shrimps so she could eat them, she stormed off like she was the queen. I was pissed obviously, so was my sister. It was just another episode of these tantrums that I hate the kids sometimes.

Jord, too, was acting up last night. He wouldn't brush his teeth before bed. I told on numerous occasions, still he didn't obey. In the end after having to raise my voice, he gave in and did what was told. He brushed only for a little bit. Still, I consider it to be a success.

When will it end? Our stay here, I mean. I was thinking that we'd be out of here by the end of this month, only to discover that the date is not yet determined for sure. My sister gave the people a call asking them about when they will finalise our case. They said it would take two to four weeks. By then, I am pretty sure the enrollment for uni would be closed. I am pissed at that revelation. So this also means that we won't leave here for some time more.

On the plus side though, K told me that the couple is looking for a replacement nanny. That's good. At least now I don't have to think too much of that.

The Return of the Monkey Kings

The title is not as a compelling a story as it might suggest. It is about my aunt aka the o, and the two kids, returning from their vacation. It was about one month and a half that they left, it's been that long.

Fast forward to the 6th of Feb, which lied on the same as the Waitangi Day, they had returned. On that day, we were supposed to go to work. The douche, however, had asked my sister to write a notice that we wouldn't open it that day. I don't know for sure why he had done that. According to my sister, he himself didn't want to go work in the morning. My thinking wasn't with her being that I believe he didn't want to bother us. Who cares anyway.

K did some cleaning in the morning. She was instructed to do so via a phone call from the shop. Guess who was it?

She did as instructed but still the douche, once he got back, did some more cleaning. So why did he ask K to do in the first place? I stayed inside the room, trying to complete the puzzle, something I had been meaning to do. I did manage to do the bottom half, only the sky to complete now. When the douche finished vacuuming, he left for the airport, and we followed in ensuing minutes.

We got there at around 12.45, having to stop for petro and for my brunch. By the time we reached to the airport, on the side of the returning terminal, we saw the plane was only in processing. For almost one hour, we saw them finally pulling two trolleys. They packed so much stuff.

The douche stocked the packages in his big RAV4 drive, and drove home. K and I followed his route back home. Once returned, I helped with unloading the stuff off the car and into the house. K began cooking soup for dinner.

The whole afternoon was spent doing nothing much. K was busying in the kitchen, with a period of shopping for ingredients, and I was just walking around and chatting away with the kids. Jord, in particular, looked like that he had grown alot over the holiday period. Jude looked similar as before but was happier.

Uncle K came with his wife. He then helped out assembling the shed, with K and. It took us aorund 3-4 hours and still we hadn't completed it. Some nailings had to be done to secure the shed to the flooring. This is something he did with his wife last night.

I don't know what to make about their return. One thing for sure is that the douche was glad to see his family back. Who wouldn't? As for my sister, she was abit sad as it means that her freedom would be compromised. It's not going to be long though. We will leave when we go to school.

The Good Old Days

The last couple of days felt like it was the renewal of the old days. Not that I wanted to have these nostalgic memories back, it was that the reality it hit in the face too quickly that I wasn't ready for it. I mean, I knew they were coming back on a specified time, but it expected to get my documents back prior to the return of the kids. I am still stuck and based on my sister's conversation with those people this morning, it is going be so for the next two to four weeks. It's so unfair because I want it to be done now! 11 years and it's not enough for ya?

This morning was one of those scenes that crept through to the new year. The girl was being stubborn, didn't consume her brekkie, which made me angry. I didn't explode like I would have done like the previous year, because I could manage to calm down. But still, the episode was bad enough.

Today, K and I drove to Otahuhu to have her bank card replaced. Then we headed to have the $5 burger combos at Wendy's, next was going to ask for the replacement card for the driver's license. We could get it because K didn't have original ID with her. All these troubles are because of moi, being the clumsy person that I am, I lost her purse on the twins' birthday almost two weeks prior. My sis didn't get mad, but I am so red with myself.

This Saturday my sister and I are invited to go to a dinner party for her friend, TD, who came back from Oz for two weeks. Since she had lost her license card, it would be difficult to go clubbing with them, so our presence there would only aggravate the situation like what happened last weekend.

My sister planned on not going, but I insisted that she should go. It's her friend's final day here, and she wanted to be normal. The reasons are overwhelming.

Yesterday, the douche and the o came back from work. They worked on the shed some more as it hadn't been completed. I should have helped out but they didn't ask and I didn't realise they were working on it until it was mid way through. It all looks bad.

We didn't do much after they returned from work. It seemed like the norm has returned. K was glued to the computer while i was doing my best imitation of the couch potato. The good old days.

Buying School Stationery

Jude walked into the room at 2 o'clock in the morning. She was crying and was calling out my name. I was too tired so I couldn't make out the cry at first. I even thought I was still dreaming. Apparently, the girl was locked out by her parents. She slept early the previous night and she was sleeping in her own room, rather than her parents. So when she got up, didn't see them, she walked to their room and found she was locked out. I don't know why the room was locked, but I presume that they knew she'd go to them during the night.

Anyway, she came in and cried for her mum. Naturally, we asked her to come in bed and sleep. She calmed down and got on the bed but as we were all trying to snooze off again, she was beginning to weep for her mum so more. Annoying as that was, K ultimately let her go to her parents. She knocked on the door until the d opened it. That was a tiring experience.

When morning came, I woke up to cook congee for the kids. They are going to school today. I thought that they might have one day rest after having just arrived from their vacation yesterday. But no, even the o herself is going back to work immediately.

I prepped the kids' school stuff, while my sis tried to wake them up. Jord is really stubborn. He didn't want to get out of bed. I guess as they as grow older they get more rebelious. The morning reminded me of why I didn't want to be here. It was that morning when the children are doing their best not to pay attention to you in the while you try your best to get them to school. We had lots of these mornings last year, which made me felt saddened and angry. The sentiment has returned. Well, I still love the two kids, so that is part of the norm.

Today we will go get stationery for the kids. It'll cost alot. Looking at the list, it'll be an exciting event. The kids, as well as the stationery, need shoes, bags, lunchboxes, and PE uniform. My sis had already spoken to the couple about it and they said we pay first and they'll remedy the payment afterward.

The Imaginary Well and Night Out

I was meaning to blog yesterday but upon returning from the city, it was really late that I couldn't get online to do so. Anyway, here I am now writing about the events that happened. And I have to admit, it was quite eventful.

In the morning I woke up at around 8.45. I looked at the clock and I was still in the droozing phase. I told myself that I still had spare time to waste before going to counselling, so I went back to have more sleeping time. AT nine, that was when I truly had my body dragged up and went to brush my teeth. I told K to prep as I knew she'd take longer than myself. She did take her time, and by the time she came back from the bathroom, the time already reached half past ten. I had only thirty, but I still wanted to shower. All this added up to me being to see Bridge, my cousellor. She even called as we were making our way there. I was embarrassed, ok.

Anyway, the counselling for this session was focused on an imaginary hole. She told me about a five chapter story which focuses on the telling of your situation. Here is how the story went:

• Chapter one- you are walking down a street. You fall into a hole. It's not your fault. You can't get out of it.


• Chapter two- you are walking down a street. You fall into a hole. It's not your fault. You can see how you fall, but you don't know how to get out of it.


• Chapter three- you walk down a street. You see the hole, but still you manage to fall into it. It's your fault, and you can't get out of it.


• Chapter four- you walk down a street, you see the hole and you evade from falling into it by walking around it.


• Chapter five- you walk on a complete different street.

Bridge asked me which chapter does my situation belong in. I thought about it for a few minutes, my mind was circling on either chapter one or two, and I resorted to telling her that I believe I am in chapter two.

We talked further into more details about the image of the hole. She asked me questions like what does the hole look like, what colour is it, is the sky dark or light time, the weather, etc. Is there a tunnel? I said that the hole is dark in colour, there are stars in the night sky, no tunnel as I see it being a well.

"Does the well have water?" she asked.

"No, it's dry and deep"

We explored the imaginary well some more. She questioned about the location of the well. She added is there anything or anybody that could help out of it?

"Umm...I don't know where the well is, but I do know that it is sitting in an isolated place. I believe the only person who can help me get out of it is my sister. But at the same time, I don't want her to be that person because I am afraid she could end up in there with me."

"Where do I stand in all of this picture," asked Bridge.

For a moment I thought Bridge was trying to ask whether seeing her helps. But when I told her that I imagine her at the top of the well, she further investigated on why I said that. I told her it was because I see her as somebody who is wholesome, having a great family, well educated and ultimately happy. She let out a little tear and thanked me. She said she does have a wholesome family and she is grateful for it. She was happy to hear from me.

Bridge said she could help me. She's got the experience and the tools to aid me out of the well.

For the rest of the session we talked about the family dynamic. We talked about the douche being like a dictator in my eyes, and aunt is his servant. We talked about how he is putting on a facade, so people on the outside looking in will see how perfect he is, which does not truly reflect the reality. We also talked about how my leaving the house would reflect on the parents, the kids, and myself. I told her that I feel like a leech in their house, something she said it is not true, being that the species itself clings onto a host until the host becomes useless then it releases from it. I couldn't help but feel that way, I said.

By the end of the session, she gave some homework to do. First, she wanted me to draw an image of the well. Write down words that make me feel inside that well, and have her and my sister's images on the top of the well. Next, she wanted me to do some thinking. Think about the possibilities of things that could happen when I do decide to leave the house. If leaving is bad, how does being stationary help?

After the session, I paid the fifty five dollars, and K, who was waiting pour moi outside, and I returned back to the house where we had the clothes hung on the line. We went to have lunch at the junction near our house.

Stupid me that I forgot to bring money, so my sis couldn't get her pie. We once again came back to the house to retrieve it. After that we headed to the stationery warehouse to purchase school material for the twins($100 ripped off).

We got to the libray but didn't borrow anything. K found out that she needed to an id to get a replacement card. I lost my sis' purse last Saturday after the twins' birthday dinner. I hate that.

We went back home and we stayed there until 4.30. This time, we headed to uncle Kong's house because we had to give him the stationery that we bought from earlier. K and I kinda hoped that he'd pay us but it wasn't the case.

For dinner, we ate at the Taiwanese restaurant. We ordered the same thing as last time when we were there with my sister's friend, SL.

My sis, lately, is abit cautious about health. She now insisted that we take a long walk after dinner. That was what happened when we directed the car to the park near our house. There, we walked for a very long time. At one point, we managed to take route that led to nowhere.

While we walked, we also talked about random topics. On that randomness, we ventured on the topic about my sister's friend who resides in oz. Then, and there, I made a phone call to her. I don't what got into me, but I felt the call was free anyway, so what was the harm. Beside, K had to contact her eventually.

The call reached an answer from a familiar voice. My sis spoke into the phone, but the answerer was in a crowded and noisy place, so she could hear. But it was obvious that the friend was now back in NZ.

My sis texted instead, telling her that she wanted to speak to her. The friend we will call TD replied and said they should meet up that night. I think K wanted to go anyway, so I pushed her to meet with her friend. It turned out the friend was having dinner with a bunch of other friends from school whom my sister knew, she said for my sis to go there. We did that as my sister was anxious and excited at the same time.

We drove for forty minutes to reach and parked near the restaurant. My sister went in while I waited in the car. For a little bit, I did walk around to kill the boredom. When my sis came back, she invited me to join them as the crew was heading to the casino. I agreed, and i met my sis' old friends; MD, TD, this guy from her accounting class, TD's couple of male friends, FA and AC. These people were very kind because when K and I, who didn't have IDs, couldn't get in there, they also didn't go too. We went to the DECK club and saw some performances. My sister was loaded with elation and jubilations. She couldn't stop talking and laughing. She even went to dance at the dance floor!!

At one stage into the night, my sister pulled TD aside to tell her the truth about the last few years. MD walked in on them and she now knows about it too. At least, K can now relax about telling her friends.

I learned that TD only came back to NZ for two weeks to have her visa renewed. It was funny how I called on the night that she came back and partied with the people who knew K. What a coincidence!

About my sis' friends, they are accoutant geeks. All but one took accounting in uni. The other one does nursing.

We got kicked out of the DECK because of the lack of IDs from K and I. We were party poopers really. We decided to meet up again next Saturday and this time we were told to bring the IDs. After the events tonight, one cannot forget to bring them.

We departed by this point. It was a lovely night. My sis loved it, and that is all it mattered.

Awkward In the Car

The phone rang in the morning to inform us that the car was ready to be picked up by 5.30. K and I planned on cleaning the house and then walk to pick it up ourselves. My bro and his wife were in Ham so they were out of the window for choice.

We had noodles for lunch. Then we cleaned the house. Well, my sis did majority of the cleaning and I was lazying around, doing the perfect imitation of a hippo.

Beside eating and cleaning, we also did watching tv and trying to connect to the internet. It was funny that it all took us quite some time to do them. My sis had another task from the douche to do. She was supposed to call the council. We couldn't contact them, the reason being that we couldn't find their number. We did manage to give Apple a call. It was to repair the ipods.

Around 2.45, we began to walk to the garage. It was my sis' idea. the length is very far but still we planned on walking all the way to Otara, eventually catch the bus to our destination. Before that, I texted my brother to ask him when he'd return. He gave me a call, somewhat angrily when spoken to me.

We agreed to meet up so he could take us to the mechanic. We decided then that we'd go to my uncle Kong's house. We took another route than our usual one, and walked until we reached the house 35 minutes later. When we got, my brother and his wife arrived in no time.

They looked mad, especially my sister in-law. She looked stoic and stared into the blank. It was apparent that they had an argument. It was really awkward. As soon as we arrived at the mechanic's, we got out immediately. I didn't want to be in that situation again after my previous encounter on Tuesday.

The car was fixed according to the people there. They said that there was a problem in the sensor (not sure what that is). We drove out of the garage and my brother left by driving off. We went to Korean supermarket and had an ice cream each. Got home afterward, and then headed to my uncle Kong's house.

After having dinner with uncle and aunt, they gave us a red envelope each. They are my idols, man. This is my first and only envelope that I receive this year for Chinese New Year. Thanks uncle and aunt!!

Car Problem Revisited

K, my sister, was late for work. It was not the usual her going there late intentionally. She had to be at the labtest to have her blood taken. She then headed to repay the amount due when she couldn't pay for the medicine yesterday. In that between travel time, her car began to act funny. It was then that she stopped on the side and called me.

I was sitting in front of the tv and the computer when the call came. I picked it thinking it was possibly my brother who wanted to ask whether I'd go to his house or not. When she voiced, I knew it was my sister and I knew she got in trouble. She told me that her car was troubling and she had to stop near our old shop. She was using the phone at the dairy near there.

I immediately phoned my brother telling him to go pick K up. He said he'd come to get me first, so I had to prepare before he gets there. I did as told, but still had the delay when he reached at the house. We drove there in about 10 minutes.

Once there, K asked me if I called the douche to inform him about the car problem, thus she wouldn't be at the shop on time. I of course said no, which she then did the call herself. The conversation was brief and I knew the douche was angry by the sound of how my sister responded. She told me later he was snobby and talked like she was wasting his time. His current nickname is well deserved.

What happened next was Ken calling the towing truck. They charge $90. The towing truck followed us to the mechanic in Otahuhu, where we told them about the engine returning to its problematic past. They took it in and had a test drive which, to them, was fine. Nonetheless, the car would remain there for a day where they would have a proper checkup. K had removed her valuables into Ken's car.

After having talked to the mechanic, we drove to K's work. She was dropped and was told that my brother would go pick her up in the evening. She denied, wanting to take the bus after work, but my brother adamantly insisted. He and I then went to the club to play snooker.

I am now sitting in the living room with L's computer. Ken and she are in the city centre to see the seller. I stayed behind because I don't want to be intrusive in their dealing.

Happy Chinese New Year to everyone who is celebrating it! Our family is not one of those sadly because the o and the kids are away. Still, nothing stops you from enjoying but yourself. Have a good year!

Morning and Naming

The Hole in the Rock

This morning I woke up to the ticking clock. It read 7.30. I couldn't help but wondered if I should go help out with the twins, and their going to school. I asked K whether she wanted to go. 'Not,' was her answer.

We instead headed for the doctors. She had an appointment with one of them. I think her throat was infected. We stayed there for forty five minutes.

I came back to the house, after rejecting my brother's invitation to see him today. I know it's bad of me, but still... the whole yesterday fiasco, and the fact that I could potentially spark up more fires if I saw my sister-in-law, so it was best to remain home.

Onto another topic. It's my idea that I wanted to start a company selling T-shirts. I realise that there have been many, many t-shirt selling companies out there. But my interest in the preservation in the quality and dignity that is the classic tee itself, I should go into it. Ok, that last sentence is bullsh*t, still though, I still want to to try it out. My sister is apparently made the co-founder.

To begin a company, one obvious thing to consider is the name. I have been pondering about it. I thought and thought, and the names, though they improve each time, still sucked. I want a cool name, with good symbolism behind it, like Apple. The task itself seems simplistic, it is way more difficult than thought. But in the end, there was one name that stuck and I think it is the one. I can't reveal it now until I have set up everything.

There are of course many other things to consider when one wants to start a business. I can' t help but get thrilled by these challenges. In the least, t-shirt business is not so expensive if things don't go accordingly.

Crumbling Bridge

This photo was taken during the stop on the Oreta Island in the Bay of Plenty

Heartache!!

So what happened today is something I don't want to mention. Yet, I do want to. It all started when K mentioned about D was coming to the house to pray as it is the tradition to celebrate Chinese New Year. I was going to be at the house, but I didn't want to be there when he comes. So I asked K to call my brother to ask him I could come over or not. I didn't call myself, being that I was hesitant to do so.

He called and replied with yes. So there we went to his house. Once there, I gave him a signal on the phone. L came out instead of him. What?! I felt awkward in seeing her. I thought she was at work during this time. It was quite bad because I sensed a negative energy. I entered the house anyway.

They ate breakfast. I waited there, then Loan began callling various numbers of plumbers. Her house had leakages when the tornado Wilma hit where we live last weekend. She spent quite some time on this task. It was discovered that there was a company who was willing to make a house call without charge. She booked them for tomorrow, as a result.

My brother, his wife and I then headed to see their lawyer. They went inside for an hour, and I waited in the car as the yoosh. What happened next was the beginning of a fun afternoon...

They began to argue. About what? A bridge. A freaking bridge. So what happened was that my brother wanted to see the opening of the bridge in the place close to the butchery they were going to buy. L had other plan, that is the appointment with the plumber for tomorrow. They started arguing over how either of them could rearrange their plans. Both were stubborn and massive explosion started to erupt.

I don't know who to fault here. My brother is probably the one to get most blame, being that he should've delayed the trip to see the bridge to another day or the day after. It's just that simple. My sister in law could've postponed the appointment with the plumber. Either way, they both would've avioded the whole fiasco.

Rather, they yelled at each other, directing each others' faults. It led to more arguments, more pain. My sister-in-law was very shouty. Her voice echoed loudly and my brother, in turn, voiced out his. I felt completely out of place. Will, who was also present, was using his computer as though nothing had happened. It was painful to be in the middle like that.

I don't know truly of the future for both of them. They fought before and they reconciled eventually. I can't see them being together again, because the argument was too much painful to not be accounted for. I hope it won't be true, though.