Trublood

The titled show came to NZ probably two or three years ago. Back then I didn't the channel that ran it... and I still don't have it. So, I never got the chance to see it first. I found out later through award shows and other review sites that tell me about how wonderful and refreshing this show is in a long time. I still didn't have the channel to watch the show on so that thought of catching the program didn't come to mind. Only last Monday that I did get that chance, and I loved it.

My video rental store only recently began to hire these TV show box sets. I borrowed it when there were other programs I wanted on the shelf. Seeing how I enjoyed it this much, I am glad to not have found the ones I initially seek.

My sister also watched the show with me. I felt slight awkwardness because it is explicit in sexual material. The horrors though was not that weird to see with your sister. My sister liked the show as well. She said she liked it for its difference from regular viewing and the characters and dialogues are compelling. Excellent production all round, according to her.

Come next Monday, I will borrow the second season. Usually sophomore or subsequent seasons are not as well done as the premier. As the show is already renewed for the fourth season, I am thinking it still has the magic in it.

Random

Many thoughts go through everybody's head each day. Mine is just happened that the thought function works more slowly and less frequent than the norm. When the children got to school this morning, I didn't think twice about the possibility that the morning would bring guilt into my life. The other school pupils were dressed in book characters as this week was themed for the book week that they had been having throughout since Monday. I, being a thoughtless man, didn't read the message the school people had sent out which I later found out. I was really guilty for this lapse. The children had to suffer because of my mistake.

I hate it that my life now consists of nothing more than surrounding my daily life with that of the children. When they are at home, I become their sole guardian. I look after them, see how they play, how they are fed, clothed, etc. I hate it. Hate it freaking so much. Other times including the time they are gone to school, I would feel a slight easiness, only to find the dreadful feeling return when the clock chimes to three. I hate that feeling the most because that is how I would imagine the alleged criminals realise their freedom is bound to be taken away from them if they are convicted.

False Dream

Just got up and the time reads 11.00am. I couldn't sleep last night and since the morning was terrible, I resumed my naptime after the children were gone to school. During which time, I was sufferring from having one of the worst possible dream ever. It is a teaser and the worst part is that it seemed very realistic. Anyway, my sister isn't here as she is at Grams' place right now, apparently consuming lunch.

The nightmare was about the outcome that I had been wishing to receive for the last ten years. It began with my sister receiving a telephone call from this judge, who apparently was in charge of our case. He talked to her privately. When the call ended, there was a knock on the door, which later revealed to be a postman. He gave K two packages from what I saw and she immediately hid them from my sight. I questioned her what was with all the secrecy, to which she responded with a shrug. I insisted on her telling me the truth. In eventuality, she did inform me that we got the results back and it is favourable. I remembered the feeling of this heavyweight lifted off of my chest. It was such an awesome relief. Then, in just one neck of a second, I woke up. Woke up to feel the anchor that is dragging my everything down. Back to reality.

Starting New School for the Twins

So this week went by quickly. The reason for it is that I have been keeping busy at just about everything that is within my confines. The week consists mostly of my sister and the children catching a nasty flu and me being their helper. My bro who lives close to us also came to support the sick people. Also another major event happened last Wednesday when the twins, who shifted house, went to their new school.

On Wednesday, still getting through her sickness over the previous day, my sis woke up early to try to get the children ready. It was particular early for her and my liking as we would otherwise have gotten later. The morning was colder than usual, which prompted me to think that winter is just only beginning even though the calendar suggests the opposite. Anyway, the reason for our premature wake was for the twins who were starting their first day of the new school. By 8.20, we were already gone to Gram's place. Only I didn't go because there wasn't room for me.

When the children arrived at school, according to my sister when later she told me, the twins were separated into different rooms. My initial reaction to this was that it was ideal in that the twins would develop individualism when they are exposing new environment outside their norm. Beside, the twins wouldn't be naughty when they are split. Grams wasn't happy about this but it wasn't her decision to be made.

That afternoon, my sister was still ill and she was sleeping while my brother, Ken and I went to pick up the children, including the new entants, the twins. This, because I didn't drop them off and not knowing which rooms the twins were put into, was proven to be troublesome. I went to pick Jude and Jordan first as I was hoping the children would know of their room numbers. However, Jude did not apprehend the knowledge that morning, thus was in the unknown as well. I went to every Year One classes, in hope that I would find them there. It was not the case. I eventually headed to the office and asked the receptionist there where I would find them. The receptionist called their teachers in and we acquired that the twins were already picked up by Grams. She had been there earlier and she took the twins home with her. So the afternoon was terrible in that aspect.

My sister, throughout this week, had been sick. She caught the flu in the early days of this week, and her refusal to go to see a doctor and to take some antibiotics had proven to be a mistake. By midweek, she couldn't even mobilise and her body was compounded by soreness. My brother was a great saviour as he came here to cook for us and took us out for lunch. He did some TLC for K as well. Now my sister is doing much much better.

Today is particular nice. My brother and his wife came to our house. This is abnormal since his wife rarely came these days. Her appearance sparked a nice change for me. We went to Grams' place for lunch when she asked us to. After that, my sister wanted to go do some grocery shopping. We left the children there, so they could accompany the twins with Grams as it was to their wishes. Returned in two hours later, Ken and his wife had bought my uncle a set of pots and pans for their housewarming gift. My brother used our names in the inclusion of their gift so that we were seen as part of it as well. Tonight began when we directed our way to a Shanghainese restaurant and ended with us returning back here. It was a nice day after all. My sister is in an agreement how lovely her day had been. I am pretty sure my brother and his wife were also enjoying themselves.

Post Drought

The post has been missing quite many posts lately. I just have no better saying than to apologise for the lack of blogposts. This is because I have been busy and I don't have interesting things to post about. This does not of course help when the blog is already suffering from my non-sense posts before anyway.

For now though, here is what happened to me in the last two weeks or so:

• Last Thursday, the Lay family officially made the transition when my uncle had his belongings move into the new house. The Douche also was there to aid with the moving, where they hired a moving truck. On that night, Gramps gave K a call, as uncle wasn't picking her up, apparently due to the lateness of the moving truck. Hearing this, K immediately took her car keys and was gone.
  I was angry at her for this instant abandonment and especially with the children who were fed yet. I was more angry at the fact that I was stuck in the life that I did not want to be in in the first place, and that anger had pushed me to feel intently uncontrollable. For the next two days, the house was down with a disease called me.
  I didn't speak with my sister for three days. She didn't speak to me either because apparently she, herself, was dealing with pains that no other had dealt with.


• On Monday, Jord had his tooth extracted. I did not know this would happen when the morning arrived. K, who was still not talking to me, informed me of this news when we about to take the children to school. At hearing this, I made the trip to the dentist to see what the situation was and K could get a second opinion from me.
  Jord's tooth extraction was first brought up the last time he and my sister went to see the dentist. She said that the molar, which lied on the bottom, was infected and there was another tooth that is growing beneath it. Normally the dentist would try to savour however bad the tooth is, but for Jord it was pretty bad and it was hurting him when he eats. Too many pros to extract the infected molar made the decision easy. Right now, Jord needs a space maintainer to keep a hole left by the extracted tooth until the new one grows to fill the void. We already made an appointment to his othordontist this October. The maintainer is estimated to cost $200. His dad won't be happy about it.


• The other news worthy piece is that my other uncle, the butcher one, had asked me yesterday and today to work for him. At first, I was quite surprised to hear it because he and I don't usually speak to each other. Only in times we are left alone, which never happens. So he is wanting a worker who is able to speak English and is trustworthy enough to work at the till. I don't know what happened to the last counter worker.
  My ultimate response was no. I was truly tossed up with the decisions. On the one side, working there would at least keep me away from the children, who I don't want to scar them for life with my inadequacy and sometimes incontrollable mistreatment. Money which I could earn and the experience which I could gain from this would be a bonus as well. However, there is the problem with my brother. He doesn't like my uncle who he said is a liar and "filled with sh8t." I can't go against him, as he is my BROTHER, he is blood related, he is closer to me than my uncle is. Betraying him would create ww3, I bet. Moreover, my sister is already marginally suffering with my help with the children, with me gone, she would be pushed to her limits. Trouble one is not resolved, so I shouldn't start a whole new one, something that maybe is out of my league to begin with.

Washing Machine

We bought a new washing machine. Well, not I nor my sister, but the douche and his wife. They bought it because the old one was leaking. I didn;t notice the leakage, but according to my sister the leakage had been going on for over a month. My lack of knowledge was telling, she said, because it says I rarely do laundry. I rebuttalled stating the fact that I don't wear as many outfits as she does and her constant change of clothes, even to get the mail just outside the front door was enough to frequent her washing to a three or four dayly duty. I, on the other hand don't change my clothes that frequent as well as I accumulate all my dirty clothes to maximise each wash so I don't waste water. Ok the last bit is a lie, but still I don't wash my clothes as frequent but I do do my share of washing.

The new machine is making wave for the douche to change the arrangement of the garage stuff, including his tool cabinet and the shoe storage space. All night and day he worked on it, and involved many people's physical labour (mine not included). Finally, it was completed.

Ok the new rearrangement looks better than before, but still his way of getting the result was poor enough for me to hate it. I can't find anyone else who let others work this much, not even slave owners. Sure I am a bit harsh on him, but since I hate his guts, I won't take back my last remark!

Moving Day

Today is technically the day that my uncle and his family make the official move. Well, they haven't shifted furniture and such to the new house, but there was an official ceremonial ritual that I and my sister took part in. It was early in the morning at 10am (that's considered early in my time) that we went to pick Grams up from her house. She was going to do the moving ceremony, apparently it has to take place before noon. We took her to the Chinese supermarket. There, she bought many fruits and foods ready. After this, we directed ourselves to the new house.

When we arrived at the new address, my sister K took the keys that were given to her by the real estate agent from the previous night and she proceeded to open the door. Grams followed and she made the offerings to the house piety and other ancestrial beings. My uncle arrived in the neck of time when we were going to pray. He did his praying and so did Grams. K and I were doing it because well, we were not the ones who are moving in.

Yum char in the nearby restaurant during which I felt incredibly weak and apprehensive. My mind was telling me not to get in as my heart beat began to pound in a fast manner. Because of my uncle's insistance, we entered.

From this onwards for the rest of the day, my mood had been this terrible. When the children came back home, I was in such a terrifying state that I could cause some damage to myself. I instead proceeded to go to bed, in hope that it would ease the anxiety. Rather, the rest did not help.

I just wanted to leave this place very badly. I want to live a life. Not survive each day like I am doing right now. The more I spent here, the more I want cause harm to myself. It is the only way to let go of the pain and the suffering. But...my sister, she is also in the same situation and I don't think I can leave to cope with it on her own. She deserves more than that.

The day was supposed to be one of the happiest days of my uncle's life. How many times can one buy a neat house and move in. My uncle is making the big splash and he is officially the family man. He has his own house, his little family, and a big fat mortgage to go along with it. How grown is he? I know that I should be happy for him, and I really am. I can't help but see that he is going into the right direction. Well, there were problems along the way, but the ultimate aim was to get a good happy life, and I seriously could see it for him and his family now. I wish them the best of luck and may happiness be with them for evermore.