Going to Counselling

Going to counselling tonight. WE haven't got a car last week nor today, so we are relying on asking aunt for the car to drive to the place. I will be asking, something I don't want to do.

First Time On the Bus

Yesterday was the first time that Jude went on the public bus. I thought the kids never went on the bus, but apparently Jord had been on it before with my sister. The reason for going on the bus was that we were heading to the library and we didn't have a car. It was good time.

My brother called early in the morning because he wanted me to go with him to Hamilton. He was going to ask his other brother in law to help him move the stuff, in the fish van, but he was busy with going to seek for a car for his sister, so I am the opportunity cost. When he called, I was still snoozing, so I couldn't pick the phone up. My sister did and she came to inform while I was in a daze that he needed to go with him. I said yeah, yeah, but I would get up at 1030am. When I woke up, sis changed her mind and said she'd be the one to leave with my bro, while I remained at the house to look after the kids.

I didn't agree with it, but despite my protest, my sister still went out anyway. I had breakfast and played beyblade stuff with the kids, in particular who was in the mood to beat me. I was winning because I used a strong beyblade. Eventually I decided that I would take the kids to the library via bus and I thought it would be cool for them to ride on the bus for the very first time. I cooked lunch in anticipation to have them prepared to go out.

We had rice with the duck meat leftover from last night. We ate it taking us thirty minutes. Eventually I took them out for the 1255pm bus. The children were excited. i asked if they had been on the bus before, and the girl said that she has but only on the school bus. The boy, however, said that he had been on it with my sister. I thought he was kidding but my sister confirmed this later. The bus was prompt.

ON the bus the kids both wanted to be seated next to the window, so I had them sat at the place with four seats are facing each other. There they moved around. I even brought out my Ipod to take pictures of their excitement being on the bus. It was good experience to share with them.

The kids in unison pressed the stop button, and we got off at the shopping centre. We walked to the library. The boy thought he was going to the Manukau library, then he decided he didn't like the place. I said every library is somewhat similar. They are not that different. We stayed there and borrow a book each. I used my new library card for which I am happy to do.

Walked around the mall, we went to this cheap store, the warehouse, Farmers, in search for Mighty Beans. The kids are now collecting them, so I wanted to get something they would like. All stores we went to all sold out the product, something I found to be strange. I couldn't help but thought that probably they just didn't stock them anymore.

We had McDonald's snacks, and came back home on the bus. We got home, and my sister returned also from the moving only forty minutes or so.

So the day was cool. The children were so excited about getting on the bus, especially Jude's first time riding on it. The joy on their faces couldn't be more real and so delightful. It was just a good day.

Moving To the New Apartment

Today is the moving day. My brother and his wife are officially moving to hamilton today. We helped them shift when we also tagged along. It was a productive in that we did some cleaning in the new apartment.

The apartment is located at CBD, right over the main shops. There are two bedrooms, with a sizable kitchen and quite large living area. It was good.

We arrived at the place where there was a gate blocking the entrance to the garage of the apartment. L and ken were figuring out how to get in. Then, they called the real estate people, to which they learned that they have to dial to the security number and the gate would automatically open. They did just that. Next we were trying to suss out about the keys and stuff to get to the third floor, thus the apartment itself. Eventually the sussing out was done and we carried on with moving in the things.

We cleaned for one or two hours. The cleaning was done predominantly in the kitchen because that was the area that wasn't properly cleaned by the people. We did it to ensure the cleanliness in the place where we cook. It did quite awhile but in the end you could feel secure.

We had to go shopping for some things for the new apartment that include dish drainer. We did the shopping for quite some time. Actually it had taken us longer than expected. The shopping mall that we went to looked similar to any one of the malls we have in Auckland. I don't mean to snarl it, but it looked similar and there wasn't much to do over there. It was quite boring and generic shopping mall.

The only thing I thought was good was the ceiling. It was a high skyline ceiling which made the place very spacious. It made you feel engulfed by the size of it, but at the same time it looked different. So that is a plus.

We returned to the apartment to drop off the goods. We then returned home to have KFC with L's brother and sister. Her parents were at a wedding. The dinner was awkward. There was this dead silence which could actually murder you. Ok, it wasn't that bad, but it was close to.

Eventually we returned to the house. During the ride home, my brother asked for our final choice on whether to remain in the house or to go live with him. My choice is undecided, being that the children is my primary reason to stay. But I do realise that I want to have my freedom. So it was not a good thing either way, whether to stay or go. In the end, I think I would have to go, despite my concern for the children. My brother shared his view on this, and he said that he would like me to help him out at the butchery. I have to concern about myself, not the kids. They have their parents for that. I know that, but I don't believe the parents have the best of interest for their very own little kiddies. So that is also a concern for me.

We have made it to the house. We called it a night and tomorrow we don't have to go with him as he will be driving his father in law's fish van. I am glad to not go because I wanted to spend the day with kids.

I Got My Number

I got my IRD number today. I didn't expect it today as the person who submitted my case said it would take at least four days due to the larger than expected number of applications these days. So when they called my sister, we were at the Warehouse looking for furniture. I wasn't in the know when it happened. My sister spoke with the IRD people who asked her for the personal details to confirm who she was. Then the person revealed to my sister that she called because she has completed our application which now she could tell of the number. So my sister excitedly took down the number. She then asked about my case, which the person said she hadn't done it yet. Once she has, she would call back on her phone number.

In about one hour later, I received a phone call from the person. I was on my way to Ken's place. The call was similar to what my sister encountered. The person asked for my personal information, something I gave, then she told me about my number. I took it down, writing it on a newspaper nearby. It was quick. We were done in less than two minutes.

So now what? The question begs so much action. I want to begin schooling first of all. Above everything I want to start my education. I haven't been at it for some time, so it is definitely on the top of the list of things to do once I got my number. After that, I will slowly figure things out from there. Whether to remain in the house with my aunt and uncle, or move to Hamilton with my brother. If they let me stay there to work for them, then I got to go there. But school could be the problem then. We'll see how my school application went to truly know my fate for the next few months.

For now, I am going to bed.

Tantrum Over Carseat

Why does this family love to fight each other so bad? They are at it with one another and so pretentious when they are dealing with other people.

Well this morning was another one of those examples of those fights. The girl and the boy were eyeing for the front passenger seat. They were about to go to school when the boy decidedly took the front seat. The girl then went bananas, threatening not to go to school. The mum tried to compromise with her, which didn't help. She then threw this big ass tantrum. The whole ordeal was 10-20 minutes in length.

My sister couldn't stand it and she tried to intervene. She said then the girl would stay home, and the girl rudely yelled at her saying that she is F$%^king lazy. What? Now the girl is using the f word.

The whole scene came to a stop when the mum started the car engine, threatening to leave with her or without. She started crying historically, which then she succumbed to the pressure and got on the backseat.

So the whole scene was about basically nothing. The girl was very stubborn and should get a punishment for that tantrum. Since their return from the vacation, the two have become tiny devils. The boy had lost a tooth the other day. I didn't know it until I saw it. Shit. I wasn't happy when I learned of the news, nor am I am happy about it. I think the mum should've done something to help out with the tooth. He's losing another one, it seems. The worst parents in the face of the planet.

Family Matters

I saw Bridge yesterday. The way to see her was more interesting to report than the session itself. It was mainly due to the way we had to endure to get there.

We got home after having spent the day out getting a library card, a bank card, and the serial number for work for the both of us. Ken and his wife met us at the shopping mall so that he could help me out with getting the bank account. I only asked him which bank is good, and he responded that he'd come and help. I only acquiesed to his demand. Anyway, we arrived at the house at around 5.30am. I was urgent so I showered quickly. During which time, there was an argument happening outside the door. I could make who the crying voice belonged to and whose voice that did the shouting. In some time, the scene died down, and K and I left the place in a hurry.

Our plan was to walk to uncle K's house, and have him dropped us off at Chinatown. That is the place, newly opened, locating near the counselling centre. We walked for forty minutes or so, and once we reached his house, my heart sank. It was due to uncle K's car wasn't parked outside which only meant he hadn't come home yet. K immediately sprang into action when she dialed the phone to see where he was. It turned out he almost reached home. That was great to hear.

He took us to Chinatown once he got home. It was around 6.35pm. We had only ten minutes to get there. The time then hit 6.41pm when we arrived at Chinatown. My uncle left after the drop off. K and I argued over where she would stay in duration of my session. She was adamant that she would stay outside the centre and read her book in waiting. I didn't like that option since it would mean she had to stay outside in the cold for an hour. I told her to remain at Chinatown. She insisted and followed me to the counselling centre.

I was five minutes late. I apologised for it and Brige said it was okay. I was tired from running, feeling sticky from the shirt clinging to my skin. We walked into this room and had our session from there.

What did we talk about? The theme for last night's session was family. It was predominantly involving marriages within the extended family. We talked initially of the douchey couple. I said they are in this revolving marriage where neither of them is happy. The o isn't happy after she's fully in control of the children. She now is feeling the bite when she understands the complication with the children's day to day lives. The thing is now she is basically becoming me, only will be stuck here for a long time, which upsetting me. I felt that she is oppressed but is oblivious to it, being that she didn't want to move. I disagree of this oppression, and I would have liked she stood up to her own beliefs.

The conversation then changed to me talking about every marriages in my entire family. She asked if there are divorces, which I said yes. Two in fact. The most admired couple is gotta be my second uncle, only because they SEEM happy. The emphasis here is on the word seem as I don't really know them that well.

Next we began this drawing exercise. She told me that I had given her strong images of the oppression that the o is facing, including she is being eaten alive bit by bit, or seeing someone being murdered and you see it happening not doing anything means you're an accomplice in the crime. So which image would like to portray in the picture. I chose the one about my aunt being eaten alive from the high stress that she is dealing with.

I began by drawing aunt. She and then the children look depressed. The kids are with faces and crying tears. They are feeling confused and sad due to not knowing who their parents are, nor how they come to view the whole situation. My aunt, which I didn't include her face, was chained to this cell that surround them all. My position within the image is outside looking in, but somehow I should have been in there. I could substitute my aunt when she's not present.

I also included my sister later on. She is confined in another cell, and she is depressed for the reasons she should be doing her own stuff. I wanted her to be great, but right now she is not doing what she meant to be doing, to gain her place in the world. She is stuck, feeling inadequate, and inferior.

We ended the session with Brige telling me that the whole purpose of the drawing was to let your feelings out. Sometimes when you can't truly express them, drawing is a way to let it out and that could also spill deeper emotions. Also, they could provide you a reflection.

It was a good session. I didn't know that it was time until she said so. We came out and saw my sister waiting on the opposing building. She stayed for last twenty minutes there. Unbelievable.

We then called uncle K to come pick us up. By then the time was around 8.20pm. It was late. I felt guilty for calling him this late. It's late for people who have to get at 4 in the morning, k. So I just really appreciative of that from uncle. Thanks uncle K!

He brought us to the house.

Crappy News

Disappointed. I just learned that the application for the degree I want to study this semester is closed. So I have to wait for second semester, which is 3-4 months from now. It is so unfair, I just want to restart my study as soon as possible. Waiting for three to four more months to study seems so long. It's shit, man.