The Conference

My sister k was bravely attending a parent-teacher conference this afternoon. This being first one of the few that they hold annually, Kim's attendance would spell out some nervousness. She had been to these things before of course, but as a side effect for being stuck here this long, she contains an apprehension when she's around strangers. Despite this stress, she still let out some good showings to make the effect for the children.

UPon her return, she had many new found information to tell me,pertaining to the children's current status in their school curricullum. For Jordan, he is not doing well. His reading and writing abilities are under par when compared with his classmates and against the national standard. This is not good to hear, which I felt a gun shot into my heart. No parent wants to learn that their child is very slow in their educational development, and I am no exception. The teacher also informed K that his maths is well below expectation, but since his whole class is in the same boat as him, I guess you could say he is off the hook for this subject.

I had been complacent with his studies, Jordan's report card has given me a wake up call. I really need to step up on my study enforcement on the boy, in particular his reading and writing. I had told K that I will try to make the boy keep a journal. Each night he will have to write down how his day went, and he will need to read what he has written. This way he will make some improvement in that arenas of learnings. Reading to him each night will further encourage his thinking and listenting skills that I will need to implement. As for Maths, he is already attending a extra class on Saturday, so I can be easy with him on it.

Ju's report is okay. Marginal on expectation for both English and Maths. Since she is in a top class, she will have show she's better than that. Most of her classmates are reaching the level of above expectation, so she is catching up on them. Despite knowing that, I will take her education lightly. I want her to succed so she will also keep a journal to help improve her writing skill and increase her vocabulary. The software Mathletics is also a good educational method to encourage the study of the named subject. Hopefully by the end of the year, she will be in the same rank as her peers.

Shopping For Christmas Presents

The last few posts consisted of ugly truths about the current situation that I'm in. I want to move away from that for this post, and instead it will join force with a million other posts, talking about the merriment or non thereof of Christmas season.

K and I went out shopping to get presents for the family. It was during Christmas rush. Many people were pushing their ways through in the mall that the place turned into an arena of sort. It was not what I had invisioned what shopping would be, but I guess some people take their shopping business very seriously. Despite the on-going rush and thrust by the fellow shoppers, we had almost everyone's presents. Ju and one of my uncles are left.

I can't wait for Boxing Day to come. It's not coming fast enough for me. Guess what the day is? Yes, it is the day that the douchebag and his familly will go off on their vacation, a day that I will forever remember as the day when freedom prevails. At least for the duration that they're not going to be here. Two weeks. If anything, two weeks are better than none.

I think I will spend my two weeks break predominantly on gaming at home. I know it is such a waste of time to spend precious time on it, but it is something I have been craving ever since I bought a ps3 console. I know I won't get enough sleep, gaming all night long, but it will worth it.

As I said in an earlier post, K will be gone with her friend on a trip to Russel, whichh means the house will be occupied by moi for three days. Can't wait to experience that single's life as it should be.

So for now, though, just try my best to stay sane for three more days. Just three more days.

Summer Planning

Within the next few weeks, the family will be off on their vacation to China. I cannot wait for that to occur as i want to have the house to myself. As for K, she will be going to Russell with her friend. This will take place over two days, but the time duration won't matter because at least I can have privacy in that period. SO for the next three weeks, I have to face the ugly reality of the kids staying home after the school finishes but, in the least, I have something to look forward to.

Then, of course, I will have to face yet again the ugliness of their impending return.

Random Thoughts

• I got this feeling that I might become or have already transitioned myself into somebody I despise so much. Earlier in the week Jordan had forgotten his school shoes at school. I was angry that he was so careless about his possessions and I didn't like the fact that he seemed unconcerned about it. I thought this is the product of his parents' non-disciplinary that the kids just believe they can just new ones when lost. I told him that he shouldn't have lost his schools and he had to go to find them. The tone I used, however, was very combative to point I sounded like a douche. Obviously after the blaming, I felt incredibly upset over my behaviour. I apologised to the boy when he returned from school that afternoon. The shoes, unfortunately, are in the land of lost things.
• I am so tired right now. It is 11.32pm here and my brain is telling me to go to sleep. My body, however refuses to obey because I want to use the time being on the internet, doing stuff without the distraction from the kids as tomorrow will be Saturday. That is one of the reasons I hate being here, it is that I get to delay my interests to the time when the kids are asleep rather do it whenever I feel like it. I know life is fair, so I'm trying to get used to it.
• I just played the games of cards with K, and it was good old fun. She was beating me in the game of 13 whilst the reverse was on the game of speed. It took my mind of off the bad things in my head, at least for the time being.
• Money issue. I wanted to spend less these days because the money that is used is not mine nor it is K's. But the rate in which we spend it is quite careless. So I have to tell K about it.
• BAd skin. Why do i care so much such superficial thing? My mind has nothing else to worry over, so it chooses the next visible problem to fixate on.
• I began to gradually build some muscles. I began the regime this week, though I wasn't really into it. I tell myself repeatedly as I was exercising that after departing this confinement I will focus more on looking better, thus increase the workout. My goal is to build muscles, and looking fit. Unlike me in my current state.

Goals for the Future

Each day, my life consists of routines and then more routines. It's getting tiresome, as I had demonstrated in the previous weeks with my actions toward the douche bag et sa femme. Sometimes, some goals, made for the brighter future, can only bring me back to the thought of just bite my lips a bit longer.

• Get up each morning feeling free. Have freewill to do whatever I want. Eat dessert for breakfast.
• Get a job and education. Normalcy.
• Travel.